Wednesday, February 15, 2006
And you thought YOU were having a bad day.
Oh to be a female. Just got this email from Abu Shekha.
"Wow. This morning was amazing. I tried to put curlers in my hair and dry it to create “soft sexy waves” but apparently, I did something VERY wrong. Between the gel and the way I had them crammed up against my skull, it turned my hair into a coiled helmet frizzy Betty Boop mess. And then while I was waiting desperately for the curling iron to heat up so I could fix the terrible situation, I tried to put on my make-up. Also VERY interesting. I used the wrong brush to shade the creases of my eyes and ended up giving myself a dark grey David Bowie space arc all over my entire lid. When I tried to blend and tone it down with a Q-tip, I simply morphed it into a half Goth half Catwoman streak that trailed out to my cheek. AMAZING.
And then when it wouldn’t wipe off with a cotton ball or Kleenex, I was forced to cover it with some peachy bronze highlighter shadow. Needless to say I did not have enough time with the curling iron to make the necessary corrections, being as though I was ALREADY late. And do you call your boss at 8am on a Wednesday morning and say, “I will be forty-five minutes late because I forgot how to get ready for work”? No. SO, I am now sitting at my desk, with half an Olivia Newton John perm combined with a Conan O’Brien flip and 1980’s star gazer roller skating eyes.
And to think I have been grooming myself for the better part of 20 years.