Television ruins lives.

And causes idiocy.

A true email I received from LBB:

"Just got back from B&N. There were a host of annoying people there who tried to share my table. One lady was licking her fingers before turning pages...I HATE THAT. The second table mate...was uber annoying...here's a transcript of our convo.

Q: Is anyone sitting here?
A: No, I don't think so. Someone was, but they left.
Q: Oh, okay (sets down books--I note one is about meditation, she also has a mini zen garden [hmm] and some sort of boxed thing that involves gnomes).
Q: It's hard to find a seat here today.
A: Yes, it is.
Q: Oh, I love your hair cut! I love the layers.
A: Thanks.
Q: Oh, are you in college?
A: (obviously annoyed and trying to work) No, I'm a lawyer [and, sorry, LBB, you are many moons out of college].
Q: Oh (impressed)! I promise I won't bother you again, but, what kind of lawyer?
A: (barely looking up from books) Prosecutor [yeah, no breaking up families for LBB].
Q: Oh, a DA.
A: Actually, no. I work for [insert where she works. We're protecting the innocent, folks.]
Q: Oh.
Pause
Q: I promise I won't bother you again [hmmm, where have I heard that before], but can I ask you something?
A: (dreading question to come). Um...sure. (unenthusiastically).
Q: You know on Law and Order, how they have all those murders? Well, if there were murders in real life, it would be all over the news right? So are there that many murders?
A: [WTF????] Um, I'm not the person to ask that. I don't do homicide (totally non-responsive and annoyed).
Q: Oh."

The end. I am assuming she went back to reading about meditation and playing with her gnomes, though I could be mistaken.