Um, how did we not hear about this? How did we not get invited? I mean, we would have totally gone. Even though we don't like JSimp, per se, we would've gone. Don't try to tell me you wouldn't have come with me. Maybe one of her bfs would've been there, too! Jude! Adam! Johnny! Joe! She was pretty much right down the street and we missed it. Dangit. Good thing I've already seen her in real life.
[Does she need to stick her chest out like that? Why isn't she smiling?]
In her own words, "the purpose of life is to walk through it smiling...the universal language is love and that's shown through a smile." Really, Jessica? Is that how you show love? By smiling?