Tuesday, April 11, 2006

My New Favorite Show.

The Real Housewives of Orange County is the best show ever. Ever. I wish it were on every day. There is just so so so much to comment on and discuss.
  1. Shane is hot.
  2. Lauri is a horrible mom. She's talking about her son being "in juvenile hall" like it's just a part of life, like she had nothing to do with it. Whatever, he'll be home soon.
  3. Slade Smiley is also hot. And has the name of a muppet. Or a porn star. He also has two children from two different mothers, neither of who he married. But he made seven figures by the age of 30.
  4. Says Vicki: "If they think I'm a MILF, that's okay." They being her 21 year old son's 21 year old friends. Who she rubbed all up against wearing a bikini.
  5. Ashley, Lauri's daughter, is a horrible excuse for a child. I have never encountered (ok, so I don't know her) a more self-centered, selfish, narcisstic, lazy girl in my life.
  6. Who of us had a week long birthday celebration at the age of seven? Anyone? Anyone? And, what are seven year old boys doing playing with bras?
  7. Slade hired a personal assistant because his kept woman decided to get her "dream" job...I mean, she went to UC Irvine which, per her, is "highly academical." Smart people go there, didn't you know? No 30 something year old man needs a pseudo hot "assistant." We all know assistant can be abbreviated to ass.
  8. "We're rich, we don't have to be good."
  9. Why do they subtitle whenever the teenagers speak? I mean, it's English as far as I can tell.
  10. To he who wears bracelets and necklaces (yes, Scott, that's you): It's not okay to spend more money on the house (even if it comes with the bigger pool) and skimp on your children's lessons and your wife's oh so important pilates classes and boob jobs.
  11. Why did Vicki's hudband get laid off? And why doesn't he have a job yet?
  12. Kim is a big ho.
  13. Please please please go read their bios. Please.

Special thanks to Pirate for "finding" this.

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